It’s been difficult for me to put these next moments into words. That’s why it’s taken so long to continue. I am someone that thinks before they speak. And the “right” words just weren’t coming to me. So, here I am, just going with the flow and putting some words down. Because I know that the story will start to unfold. And it’ll be the way that it was meant to be. So… come along.

Let’s see… Where did we leave off? Oh! Martin the Irishman had passed away. I saw as his spirit ascended until I saw him (I saw myself but as Martin) in a dark space. All he could see was the person that he had learned in life was Jesus. And when Neoshi asked if she could speak to him, Martin walked into Jesus’ opened arms and sort of melted into him. And that’s when I took a back seat. I was conscious and could still see the daydream style imagery, and could see what He spoke of, but the words were sorta just coming out of my lips. They weren’t mine. My energy was also different. I felt a lot of love. Too much of it at once. Tears would just flow out of my eyes while He spoke. The moments of love that I witnessed from another past life (more on that soon, I got you!) were more profound and intense than any of the hurt that I had felt from my the moments I saw from my lives as Martin, and the young boy in the hole—Eric. He also felt like a hippy lol. Felt like just go with the flow, peace and love. All of the cliches lol! All bundled in one. He felt like it all.

“I am the one you call Yeshua.” were the words that came out of my lips after Neoshi asked “Is there a name that I can call you?” He shared that he’s been with me in many lifetimes. He has walked with me. I was reminded of the Footprints poem. You know, the one when Jesus was carrying you when you thought you were walking life alone? She also asked why I was shown the lives of Eric and Martin. Eric represented fear of abandonment, and to remember that I have all that I need inside of me. When he was saying that, I was seeing myself as Eric getting out of the hole. Which was something I hadn’t been shown earlier. And Martin showed me a life with an ancestor, showed me hard work, I worked independently and owned my shop. And to celebrate myself! Because when Martin partied, he partied lol. That lifetime, has inspired me in this one. I’ll keep the how to myself for now. And it explains why I’ve always wanted to just roam freely in open land, rolling on the lawn, walking barefoot. Just doing what I did as a child in that lifetime. Even the Mountain’s in the background is something that I’ve yearned for in this lifetime and couldn’t explain why?

Yeshua answered the questions that I had written and sent to Neoshi. In the session that I booked you can ask a total of 15 questions to ask your guides or whoever comes through. He also shared that he led me to Neoshi. That we knew each other from an earlier lifetime. I saw a dark, dark, woman with short short hair sitting on the flat dirt floor in the middle of a teepee styled hut. That woman had a baby wrapped in cloth and she was rocking the baby back and forth all the while saying “my baby, my baby.” I started to cry. Because I felt how much she loved me. The baby. Her baby. I then saw myself around the age of 3-4 years old holding her hand. We were standing somewhere and she was standing next to me. I was looking up at her with pride knowing that she was my mother. I had a sense of knowing that she was respected in the community and I was beaming and just so happy to have her as my mom.

So, there you have it. Yes, it’s true. You shouldn’t dwell too much on the past. But, this was different. It is different. I was able to receive some healing with the assistance of Neoshi, Yeshua and myself. I’ve been feeling more excited about things, when before anxiety would take over. I also made a major life decision, one that I was afraid to do. But, I did it. And I’m still here! I got this! You got this!

Before I let you go, I had a memory pop up from my life as Eric. I saw how I got myself out of that hole! Remember the roots on the dirt wall? Well, I braided those suckers together. All the way to the top! I then climbed out of there. Crafty since day one huh? Lol. Thanks for reading!

Love, light and the shadowy side too, Cin.

If you’d like to donate or support me and my blog: Cashapp $cincimma , Venmo @cincimma funds go towards learning materials, and monthly website domain fees.

The next thing that I saw (sorta like a daydream) was myself laying down on grass. It was a huge field with wild flowers, and Mountain View’s in the distance. It was just me there. It was a nice sunny day. “What are you feeling? Thinking?” Neoshi asked. “I’m just waiting for my next meal. And wondering when it will come.” I felt like I was in South America? But wasn’t sure. I saw myself stand up and making my long walk towards a small cottage, where my mom was. She had called me inside to eat. We ate bread. She was an older woman. Fair skin. She had a wrinkled face which felt like she was in her late 50s early 60s. She was a bread maker and sold it for a living. It was just the two of us. “Does her energy feel familiar to you? Can you recognize who she is?” she asked. “Uhh I don’t know it feels like… looks like.. gasp. My great grandmother! My mom’s grandma.” Life felt repetitive. I felt bored and felt a yearning for more. “Is this all there is?” “What name does she call you?” She asked. “An M name… Martin? Martin.”

Fast forward to another time in that life. It was a painful memory. I was at my mother’s bedside. She was dying and I was a mess. She was unresponsive and I was holding her hand in both of mine. I was kneeling bed side and had her hands on my face. Sobbing. Wondering what I’d do without her? What would become of me? How could I go on alone? After she passed. I remained by her side for hours. I saw when I stood up and pulled the covers over her head, and turned away from her and carried on.

Fast forward to another part of that life. I was at a pub. I was celebrating. This is when I realized that I was a man. I had curly red hair. All that I kept seeing were beer pint glasses full to the brim and me toasting and cheering with others. So much singing! Singing so many songs and dancing and celebrating. “What are you celebrating? Is it something for you?”… “Hmm I’m not sure.” I answered. “Okay, let’s take you to another moment to see if we can find out what it is you’re celebrating.”

Hmmm… I see a beautiful woman with red curly hair. She’s wearing clothes like back in the days, with buckles on her shoes. She’s radiant. Wearing a fancy hat, and one of those cloth umbrellas women use for the sun. And that’s when I saw it, me looking up at her face as I slid a ring on her finger! I was proposing! I had been celebrating my engagement at the pub!

Forgive me, because I’m not sure if this part happened before the bar scene or after. But, I saw myself as a shoe maker in that life. I saw myself hammering the soles, and being focused on my craft. I stood up, looked at my work space, and closed and locked the door to head home. I saw myself walking slowly up a hill, with both hands in my pockets. Head low. I felt defeated. Wondering… “Is this all there is?” Fast forward to my death. I saw myself in a bed made out of wood. I saw my wife, looking not as radiant caring for me. I didn’t know what was wrong or what happened so Neoshi guided me back to see what led me to being bedridden. I saw myself looking up at someone, I was on one knee, with one arm shielding my face. All went black. And then cut to the coma. Yes, I was in a coma. I was conscious though. And I felt like a prisoner in my own body. I could hear and was aware that my wife was just wishing that I’d die already. I too wished that. I longed for my death to come because she deserved to be free. And I didn’t want to continue on like that. I passed away. With her by my side. I wasn’t sure if any one else was there, but I was very aware that she was. She looked like me when my mother passed. On her knees at my bedside with my hand in hers. Sobbing. Heartbroken. I felt my spirit rising and I saw her get smaller and smaller and smaller as I just kept going higher and higher into the sky. I crossed over and I saw someone. Someone wearing a long flowy white robe was welcoming me. It was Jesus! I went right into his opened arms. “Can I talk to Jesus?” Neoshi asked.

“Yes” said my voice. But Cindia took a step back and was in the back seat.

Until my next post…

Love, Light and shadowy too, Cindia.

If you’d like to donate or support me and my blog: Cashapp $cincimma , Venmo @cincimma funds go towards learning materials, and monthly website domain fees.

31| PART THREE

30| PART TWO